ARE WE THERE YET?

If you’ve ever traveled with children you have experienced the question: “Are we there yet?” The little people are anxious to get to the destination based on what information they have. They do not know all the intricate turns, stops, possible traffic delays, and distance to the planned destination. A long stretch of road is pretty boring to a child as well as the adult. They really need to learn how to enjoy the journey.

Do you ever think you have “arrived”, --- arrival at a place of purpose? The answer to this question is always slipping from my grasp in spite of my meticulous planning to reach my destination. I want to revert to that childhood question, “Am I there yet?”, and experience my destination immediately. Yes, absurd when everything is considered, but it is the way I am.

 My involvement in church has brought many experiences -- good and bad. Yeah, I know, church is supposed to be a safe place but the dilemma is that it is filled with people like me; people who have been hurt and hurt others in turn. I want to be in that perfect place with the presence of a loving heavenly father minus the entire trauma. Maybe I’ll just close my eyes like the child in the back seat and sleep until we’ve arrived.

I have worked in church ministry my entire adult life, which amounts to over 50 years. I am more certain now than ever that I haven’t “arrived”. There is so much to be accountable for. The imperfection of our progression is all too obvious. Things happen. People interfere. Detours mess up our plans. Breakdowns occur.

I thought I “arrived” when I started teaching Sunday school when I was only 16 years old, but that wasn’t it. I escaped to serve in the USAF for a stint and traveled to the Far East during the Viet Nam era. I was definitely not where I wanted to be; Europe was my place of choice. I still wasn’t there.

Upon return stateside I returned to teach again, this time an adult class, where everybody was older than me, had I really “arrived”? The answer is a resounding “NO”.  Challenges were there and I did my best in humility to accept them. I was still not there yet.

It was years later when I finally thought, “I’ve arrived’. Yep, I accepted a pastorate and moved my family into an old mice and cockroach infested parsonage. (I was sacrificing for the sake of ministry--- or so I thought.) Within three years the church building had a severe roof condition that required complete renovation. I knew I hadn’t got there when it took more than two years of repair to retrofit the roof and redesign the building; the challenges were overwhelming because money was the big issue. And this was only one of the major problems I faced. The moment never really “arrived” for me here. There were heights of some glory and joy, but something kept driving me to press on to a destination.

I was still looking for my destination after more years went by. I figured I was proceeding in faith to see what I could do to turn around a floundering church without much success and even less glory. Sometimes I became part of the floundering around. Problems became the nature of the beast always overriding the best of times. I experienced the attitudes of the Laodicea congregation, the Ephesus Church, Corinth, Ephesus, Philippi, and others throughout my tenure as a pastor. It was hard times, and I know in retrospect I hadn’t “arrived” in any of those situations.

At a more recent point in my life God allowed someone to close the door on my pastoral effort and I was inexplicably devastated. My “departure” in getting to a destination was really getting messed up in my opinion. The unprofessional manner this dismissal was handled remain a puzzle to me. It is difficult to wrap my mind around such an incident. It becomes like the tragic highway accident while I’m on my way to my destination. Fortunately it wasn’t fatal but it required time and extensive “hospitalization” and “therapy” outside my usual comfort zones.

Well, age has brought some wisdom my way. I am now resigned to look at matters through God’s eyes and align my agenda with His more determinedly than ever. It certainly took longer than I wanted but the journey continues. Lessons have been difficult but I’m intending to pass the final exam and reach my destination of fulfilling His will. I will trust Him to get me there and enjoy the journey as the “miles” role by. I refuse to let the devil steal the joy he didn’t give me in the first place.

 

..... And no, I'm not there yet.